Life’s secret sauce: Lessons of a thirty somethin year old

I remember being in high school on the last day of my senior year and writing a letter “to myself 15 years from now”. The teacher told us to write who we would be, what our life would look like, and what we would have accomplished.

I wrote: at thirty somethin I would be making a lot of money, driving a red convertible, living in a beautiful house, with a gorgeous partner, and traveling the world.

1 of those things is true. I have traveled the world. But what I realize is that the richest life lesson I have learned is that things don’t always turn out how we want, but they turn out exactly as we need. So stop rushing to get where you’re meant to be.

So here I am thirty somethin, single, living in a one bedroom studio, on a moped, in the heart of Waikiki, Hawaii . And though there are times I dream of a house in the mountains, an amazing partner to wake up with and practice yoga and drink tea, I know spirit has rooted me exactly where I need to be for this stage of my journey. I had the gorgeous partner in the mountains to wake up to practice yoga and drink tea. I didn’t appreciate it at that time because I rushed. I couldn’t enjoy it because I was always rushin on to what was next.

Being in the city, life has called me to learn how to find silence in the hustle and bustle. If we can’t find peace in the business we’ll never appreciate true quiet.

Being on the moped in the open air has called me to breath more deeply and enjoy the scenery, the process. Being in a one bedroom studio has called me to learn how to live minimally. When we can live with minimal things we can embrace the most important things in life, experiences, connections, the journey.

There is no perfect day. I would be lying if I sat here and said I have the recipe for living your best life! shit, I am still aligning with that for myself. I find that I am learning the recipe in stages and with patience the secret ingredient is coming to me.

So if you resonate with learning to slow down to practice grace, learning when to move when spirit calls, and in releasing this ridiculous idea of perfection this blog is for you.

Know that you are never late or too old, you are right on time.


Lesson one: Stop rushin!

A mentor of mine told me this years ago when I was searching for yoga teacher trainings. When I asked her advice about finding a teacher for me she said, “ stop rushin”. It annoyed me at first, I thought “rude”. But truly it’s been one of the best pieces of advice I’ve received in my life.

Western culture drills it in us that to be moving fast means we’re successful and getting shit done.

We often times rush to a destination and we miss the entire purpose of the journey. This mind frame has caused me to have to redo a lot things and start over because I was racing against myself.

Slow down!

You aren’t late. You aren’t behind. You aren’t missing out. You’re right on time. breathe my friend. Right now, take a deep breath in your nose, a full breath. Hold it a moment, slowly let it out and relax your shoulders.

Stop rushing to the next step and embrace the moment.

A helpful tip from a person who has struggled with anxiety her entire life:

Spend some time preparing. We can’t plan for everything, that’s life! However, the more intention we put into preparation for the next step the less likely we’ll be stressed and pressed when things are coming.

Most peoples anxiety is triggered by a fear of running out of time.

Prepartion is actually an act of self care.

It helps us feel calm and reduces the pressure to rush.

A practical example:

Setting your yoga mat in plain sight. If you want to practice mindfulness more and often feel rushed in the risings or tired in the evening. Set it in a place where you can see it and in a natural path.

For me I set my mat at the foot of the bed. When I rise, I roll it out. Then, when I return from using the restroom to make my bed my mat is layed out.

By doing that I’ve increased my chances of actually practicing yoga. The small preparation goes a long way and helps us prepare for a positive and uplifting experience. I feel better when I practice. I feel crummy when I rush. Yoga reminds me to breath and be here in the now. Therefor, preparation and setting myself up to practice helps me have a better day , slow down, and feel relaxed. See what I did there!?

This is a helpful pattern shaping technique I’ve been practicing from the book:

“Atomic habits” by James Clear

Implementing mindfulness into your life will give you a constant reminder to Stop Rushin!

Try this affirmation:

Today, I am exactly where I am supposed to be.

You’re doing great. You’re right on time so take your time. You’ll get there at the perfect time.

We can’t get moments back so embrace them. All of them.

You are loved!