A love letter to my Yoni
Yoni: Sanskrit (Hindu) meaning ¨womb¨ or sacred temple. The Yoni is the symbol of the Hindu Goddess Shakti. Shakti represents divine cosmic energy and divine feminine energy. The Yoni is our center for power, sexuality, insight, and intuition.
Before we can heal we must reconcile the past and any wrong doings that have affected us. When we acknowledge the pain we grow capacity to forgive and move from a compassionate heart.The journey begins within.
My story is deep rooted in pain from past experiences where my sacred space was violated by men. Since the age of 6 I developed the ability to leave my physical body and take refugee in my mind. This manifested itself as detachment from reality. I never got to know the unique voice of my Yoni, I never got to understand my voice of intuition.
In getting to know my Yoni and understand her gifts I had to first acknowledge my regret. I had to speak of the shame I have kept buried inside. To build a loving relationship with her, I decided to write her a letter and read it to her. In forgiving myself, I ask my Yoni to forgive me. When we release and let of the past we then have the space to create an organic connection through love and respect with our sacred temple.
To any of the Goddesses reading this if you have lost connection with your temple, are seeking to know HER divine power, let go of past trauma or shame stored in your temple YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
What-ever your relationship is to your Yoni know you are supported, and loved.
I invite you to embark on this journey of forgiveness with me. In-order to transcend into our divine feminine power we must acknowledge the pain we are holding onto and ask for forgiveness.
Let us begin by writing a letter and reading it aloud to her.
For the times I didn´t ask for your consent before welcoming partners into your sacred space.
For the times that pleasure out weighed intention
For the times desire for connection cast shadow over spirit led alignment.
For the times I ONLY sought your counsel when something was leaking into my aura dark cloaked and ill intention.
For the times I hushed your attempts to communicate with me and shoved you aside.
For the times I used you for the sole purpose of sexual pleasure rather than energetic healing.
For the times I kept welcoming the same familiar strangers around your vibrant light.
For the times you needed rest and I thirsted for satisfaction.
For the times I reacted instead of asking.
Please forgive me.
It took me to cry out to you and hear echoed silence to realize for years
I hadn´t answered your calls.
It took for something to be ¨wrong¨.
It took that call from the O.B.G.Y.N stating, ¨your lab results came back and we have some concerns¨,
To realize I have been long causing you harm by gluing my sweaty palm to your lips forcing you to be quiet.
It took pains like chard glass nestled in my veins to stop and become aware.
It took mahogany stained underwear that triggered decades of repressed shame.
It took me taking a voyage to the depths of my womb with a lantern of courage to discover where I had abandoned you.
It took me to explore the deep rooted shame of men imposing their flesh on me
suffocating my innocence.
It took holding my bloody womb in my arms
to die and be re-born again.
Please forgive me.
The ways I responded in the past are no longer serving me.
I choose to release and let go and ask for your forgiveness.
For the times my voice left my body,
For the times I burrowed inside my head to feel safe while un-consented energy hovered over my glass temple peering in,
For the times I did not check-in with you before making a decision that would later leave me nauseated with regret.
Please forgive me for allowing my ego to guide my steps.
I love you.
Your intuition protects me from unsavory energy.
Your essence inspires my every dream
And with your blessing every vision becomes a reality.
From this day forth I choose to honor the gift that is you.
To acknowledge and embrace your divine connection to source energy and mama earth.
To listen and notice.
To be still and rest.
To move with intention
and to forgive myself for the times I didn´t show up as my best.